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12 Weird Things All Cat Owners Do In Secret!

I’m a doting cat owner. I can’t do enough for my cat and I’ll admit I’ve become a little more obsessed with his needs since we lost his beautiful brother three months ago.

Non-cat owners often say we’re a little crazy! They find our behavior weird – and that’s just the behavior we allow them to see!

Imagine if they knew about all those other little things we do in private when there are no other witnesses but our cats. They would think we have totally lost the plot!

But it’s OK! We love our cats and we’re allowed to treat them as the superior little beings that they are. You may have thought it was just you, but you are not alone! All cat owners do at least some if not all of the things in this list … don’t they?

1. We refer to ourselves as our cat’s mummy or daddy

Weird things cat owners do

I walk into a room and if my husband is no longer there, I ask our cat, “Where’s Daddy gone?” He often meows back.

When I walk in from work I call out, “Harry, Mummy’s home!” He comes running downstairs to greet me. Admit it, you do this too!

2. We kiss them and treat them like our babies

When we let our cats out (and I know not everyone is able to do this), we ask them to be careful outside and come back soon.

When they come home, we scoop them up, give them a kiss on the head and ask them where they have been. We don’t believe we will ever catch germs from them.

Cat on a wall

3. We hold conversations with them

We speak to our cats as if they understand. Well, actually we really believe they do understand. If our cats meow, we reply as if we know what they have just said. Actually, we do know, don’t we?

These conversations last for quite some time. We don’t think this is at all strange!

4. We mimic their meows

We try to imitate our cat’s meows exactly to see if they actually understand us. If they meow back we convince ourselves we have succeeded … well, we have, haven’t we?

Two Maine Coons on a window ledge

5. We invent new nicknames for them every day

When we get a cat, we choose the perfect name for it but then proceed to make up different nicknames for it every day.

So far today I have called Harry:

  • Purrball furball
  • Harry warry
  • Meow cat
  • Fluffy bum
  • Cat I’d marry
  • Purry furry

Over the last 15 years, he must have had thousands of silly names.

6. We sing to our cats, often working their names into the lyrics

Think of your favorite song. Have you ever sung it to your cat? Have you ever added its name in somewhere? Yes, I bet you have.

“I love you Harry, and if it’s quite alright I need you Harry, to warm my lonely nights, oh little Harry, trust in me when I say!” (You’re Just Too Good To be True: Frankie Valli)

7. We purr with them

When our cats are purring contentedly, we can’t stop ourselves from purring too. We practice all sorts of lip and tongue positions to perfect the sound.

8. We tell them our troubles

When we’ve had a bad day, we tell our cats all about it and remind them that they are lucky because they don’t have to go out to work or follow a routine or worry about money or cook meals or do housework and so on and so on …

They usually look blankly at us or walk away when we haven’t even finished telling them.

9. We change our plans for them

Sometimes we change our plans just for our cats. We might have been planning an evening out, but the cat settles on our lap and we hate to move it. So we open a bottle of wine and stay home instead.

Maine Coon on a lap

10. We use them as hot water bottles

If our cat decides to lie on our lap, we feel honored. If it’s a chilly evening, we do everything to make it stay because it is keeping us warm. After a certain amount of squirming, we have to let it go or risk retaliation.

11. They are allowed to cover us in hair

We spend hours removing traces of cat hair from our clothes before leaving the house but if the cat wants a last-minute cuddle we allow it on our lap even though it means we will have to repeat the de-fluffing process and will now probably be late for work.

12. We think they need food when they don’t

We can’t leave the house without popping another pouch of food in the cat’s dish. The cat is nowhere to be seen, there is untouched food in the bowl but we worry that it doesn’t like that flavor.

When we get home, we throw away more left-over food than the cat has actually consumed – every day!

Kitten in its food dish

There are many more …

But I’ll save them for another day. Email me your guilty secrets and we’ll include them!

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