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How Do I Get My Cat To Like Me?

Every cat is unique and it’s important for us to appreciate this. Some are easier to get along with than others and some just need more time to get to understand and trust you. I strongly believe that it’s possible for anyone to form a strong bond with any domestic cat. I have been doing this all my life and it’s not difficult when you know some simple tricks.

So, without any further ado – here they are. I guarantee that if you integrate these things into your relationship with your cat they will end up not only liking you but wanting to spend a lot more of their time with you.

Lastly, thanks for searching and finding this. You’re obviously someone who wants to improve the relationship with your cat and that tells me that these steps will definitely work with you.

The best way to get your cat to like you is to think more like a cat yourself. The very best way to get your cat to like you is to always remain calm.

8 great ways to get your cat to like you!

1) Always remain calm around your cat

Depending on your personality, this can be difficult! Cats are sensitive to loud and unexpected noises and their eyesight lends itself to detect the tiniest of movements. My first bit of advice to you is to ensure that whatever you do around the cat that you’re trying to bond with, do it slowly.

This is the reason why a lot of cats bond easier with adults than they do with children. The latter find it a lot more difficult to do things slowly (which is fine, they’re kids after all). But, these quick movements, that usually go hand-in-hand with loud noises are not on the top-10 list of things that cats like!

adorable cat close up.
Photo by Henda Watani on

Try not to run around near them (the cat that is, not the kids….) and keep your voice calm around them. If your children have just decided it would be fun to do some painting over your new white sofa, take a deep breath before letting all hell out of your mouth!

Remaining calm lends itself to the second point. Which actually, is my most effective weapon-of-choice when trying to bond with any cat. Keep this one to yourselves…

2) Blinking slowly and yawning towards your cat

You may have noticed that when cats face-off against each other, they stare intently, not averting their gaze for a nanosecond. That is until one cat backs down and looks away. By staring at a cat you could be giving them the wrong signals. Your cat may perceive your staring as a threat – which you absolutely (and obviously) do not want.

So, what are you meant to do when you need to look at your cat? Well, it’s easy – you don’t stare but look away every few seconds. But, here’s the trick. When looking at your cat, after a couple of seconds, perform a very slow blink. Shut your eyes slowly and then open them slowly before deliberately moving your whole head away to make it obvious you’re not staring at them.

Then, yawn. Make it a very obvious, slow yawn (I bet just thinking about this is making you want to yawn right now!) but ensure you do it without making those loud ‘yawn-noises’ which some people insist on doing!

Yawning cat.
Photo by Marie Lemaistre on

Your cat will look at you, fascinated by this. They will take it all in and will start making those connections. They will be thinking that this large animal opposite them does not appear to be a threat. It may not happen instantly (although I have seen this happen) but just doing this every time you meet your cat can have a huge difference.

Combine this with the next tip and prepare to look (and feel) stupid…

3) Roll onto your back

Just accept that you’re going to feel silly but it’s for the greater good. Those people that know will understand, those people that don’t will never…

You may have noticed that occasionally when you enter a room where your cat is, they roll onto their back. This is them telling you that they perceive you as no threat.

When you’re down at their level (which you should always do if possible), very slowly roll onto your back with your arms and feet in the air, mimicking the way cats do it.

There, I told you you’re going to look stupid. But honestly, look at your cat whilst you’re doing it (not forgetting the blinking) – they will be looking at you and what you’re doing.

Again, this is sending more signals to your cat that they can trust them and you do not see them as a threat!

4) Don’t follow them

Not the easiest advice to follow but if you can, let them come to you rather than following them around the house. Although your intentions are good, this behavior can stress them out.

What you want is for your cat to come to you when they are ready. You want them to be in control of when this happens. It’s fine for you to go into the same room as them and play with them (more on this in a bit) but my point is, if they leave the room and go into another room don’t follow straight after them.

To them, it may appear that you are chasing them – which isn’t obviously the outcome you want! So, anyway – I mentioned about playing with them, so…

5) Be the one that spends time with them

It can be frustrating to know that your cat doesn’t perhaps like you as much as you like them. But it’s 100% reversible so don’t worry. You need to be persistent and be the one who does the fun things with them and this is similar to how dog-owners bond with their dogs.

You should spend time with them. Ideally, playing. So, get their favorite toy, or just a bit of string (they really don’t care) and play. Yes, their attention will be more focused on the thing you’re holding rather than you but they will start associating the feelings they have when they are playing (and happy) with your presence.

Maine Coon.

Feel free just to use string, as I mentioned – but if you want a bit of color then go for one of the cat wands. We use this Cat Dancer from Amazon and it’s as cheap as chips. If you don’t already have one, you’re not going to break the bank in getting one!

So, you’re now the one that spends a lot of time with them, now…

6) Be the one that feeds them

Similar to the above, where your cat will start associating you with the good feelings they have when they’re playing. Always try and be the one that feeds them as again, you will get this association and reliance – which is a good thing.

The best time to do this is when they are most hungry. This is usually first thing in the morning. Be the person who consistently satisfies this hunger by feeding them when they want it most!

Alternatively, as this may not always be possible, be the person who gives them their favorite treats. Our Mona, a Maine Coon, goes crazy for ‘Dreamies’. As they’re a treat and we shouldn’t give her too many she loves it when we give her these.

7) Smell like you…

Again, something that a lot of people just don’t think about is how they smell. Although their noses aren’t as sensitive as dogs, a cat still has somewhere between 9 and 17 times better smelling-power than us mere humans!

What does this mean exactly? Well, it means that smells that are strong to us are a lot stronger to your little cat. So, when you put on your nice smelling aftershave or perfume, you might smell great to you and everyone else, but to your cat – it’s going to be a very strong (and possibly repulsive) scent.

Therefore, when you’re at home and trying to connect with the cat (and make them like you) – don’t wear anything that makes you smell in any way other than you do naturally.

8) Give them time…

It can be incredibly frustrating I know. You have nothing but love to offer to your cat but they just don’t seem to realize this. They seem to think that for whatever reason you are potentially a threat.

Although it varies from cat to cat, it most likely won’t be an overnight fix. What I can say though with absolute certainty is that if you persist in the above tricks and just have patience with them – you will end up with a cat that loves you.

Maine Coon by fire.

They will love you because why would they not? You’re doing everything you should and not doing anything that they find disturbing. Also, I’ve done this many times myself, not only occasionally with my cats but with others.

Some final words

I haven’t mentioned anything about socialization here. This describes the first few weeks of their life when any cat should be introduced to as many different things (including people, other animals, children and noises) as possible.

This has a big impact on how calm and accepting the cat will be with potentially unfamiliar surroundings and people. The reason I haven’t mentioned it here is that if you’re reading this then this part of their life has already gone and there’s a good chance this didn’t take place.

That’s not your fault and not even relevant as there’s nothing you can do about it.

Just follow the above steps and you will see results most likely immediately, if not, soon after.

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